Council Post: How CEOs Can Deal With Monday-Morning Dread

Mike Sill is the CEO & Co-Founder of Sunday Scaries, a CBD company with stress relief products.

It’s often said: “Leadership is all about strength. Never let them see you sweat.”

I don’t agree with this sentiment.

CEOs are human, after all, and research suggests we might be particularly vulnerable to stress and anxiety. A paper by the Center for Economic Policy Research found that CEOs age about 1.5 years during industry-wide downturns.

Steve Tappin, author of The Secrets of CEOs, interviewed 150 CEOs and found that about two-thirds of chief executives are struggling, and the emotions they often experience are frustration, disappointment, irritation and overwhelm. In an interview with CNN, Tappin argued that being the boss should come with a “health warning.”

I’ve experienced these problems myself as the CEO of Sunday Scaries. But I’ve also discovered some practical ways to handle the real “Sunday scaries” — the undercurrent of stress that makes Monday-morning drives miserable affairs.

1. Change your perspective. Vulnerability can be a strength.

Vulnerability researcher Brené Brown has done some work that puts a pin in the idea we always have to lead like Gary Cooper in High Noon. It turns out that the strong, silent type isn’t necessarily that strong — or courageous. Brown’s Ted Talk “The power of vulnerability” in leadership has more than 51 million views (and counting).

I found her thesis to be simple yet powerful: Perfectionism does not drive success and can actually hold us back. There is far more strength in acknowledging and embracing our vulnerability. By doing so — and sharing it with others — we gain perspective and the ability to connect while removing a barrier to success.

“Vulnerability is not knowing victory or defeat; it’s understanding the necessity of both. It’s engaging. It’s being all in,” Brown said in one interview published by Forbes. “It’s about owning our vulnerability and understanding it as the birthplace of courage and the other meaning-making experiences in our lives.”

There are two main ways I show vulnerability to my team. The first is to adhere to one of our company core values and “keep it 100.” While I do have thick skin, it’s not impenetrable; I’m honest and admit my failures by revealing how I dropped the ball. This brings out a human element that my team can respond to and connect with. I’m not perfect and don’t pretend to be, and they respect that.

The second way I show vulnerability is by being open about my mental health. From social media and from the exterior, it might look like I’m happy and optimistic 24/7. This certainly isn’t the case. I let my team know when I’m burnt out, sad or when I need a break, and they are quick to jump in and have my back. Covering up my internal darkness to show strength is a heavy burden and ends up ultimately being a weakness. Everyone deals with self-doubt and negative feelings. Connecting with one another is the answer for turning them positive.

2. Put the smartphone on hold.

When I wake up, there is one thing that I do not do: roll over and grab my phone. Many of us are tethered to these devices, and they do have many benefits. But I believe checking your email or social media first thing in the morning is a perfect way to wake up on the wrong side of the bed.

Instead, go through a clarifying morning ritual that energizes you. I practice a little meditation, jot down my three big goals for the day in a journal and eat before diving into that digital black hole. This sets me up to be efficient for the day, and it helps me avoid distractions that disrupt my calm.

3. Lean on (and learn from) others.

Whenever I’m under pressure and feeling isolated, I do not hesitate to pick up the phone, hang out with family or have lunch with a friend. It’s easy to get trapped in your own mind when dealing with intense stress, and conversations with loved ones can set us free. They immediately remind me of the things I should be grateful for and why I work so hard in the first place.

If you’re after some more hard-nosed advice, make sure to leverage professional peer groups. I’ve gained immense value and peace of mind tapping into the experience and advice of others. Find a mentor and, ideally, a group of colleagues outside the company who share their experiences and hold you accountable. Gaining confidence from others is a powerful stress reliever.

And here’s a tip that might go against CEO instincts: Try sharing with and learning from your direct competition. I’ve nurtured relationships with a group of competing executives. We scrimmage with each other to elevate each other’s game.

4. Plan for personal time (and maybe read a book).

The key here is to set aside time to unplug with stuff that is not associated with work. I dedicate days to downtime where I purposefully detach from the business. And perhaps nothing accomplishes this better for me than reading.

This strategy goes far beyond books, of course. Whatever captivates and refreshes you — do it. CEOs stress out because we are ultimately responsible for everything and often try to fix any problem whenever it happens. It’s a self-defeating strategy.

I never operate at my highest capabilities without taking time off to replenish. Failing to take breaks simply means I work impaired with low levels of continual stress. I suspect this is the same for everyone.

Reading, taking a hike or working tasty waves on the surfboard are as essential to high-performing CEOs as being able to read a profit-and-loss spreadsheet. We live in a culture that venerates breaking ourselves with hard work, but I believe times and perspectives are changing. There’s no reason becoming a CEO has to come with a health warning.

Implementing intentional strategies to beat the dread you feel at the beginning of a new week can give even the busiest exec a healthier life — and make us better CEOs.

Forbes Business Council is the foremost growth and networking organization for business owners and leaders. Do I qualify?